hmmmm

Hope

Do you ever get discouraged and question all that's going on in your life? I do. As my profile states, I'm over 40. I've never been married and have no kids. I live with my Mom - (ie. no home of my own). I also have health problems that may prevent me from ever having children, unless God provides a miracle. Will I end up a spinster, looking to extended family for help in my old age (Lord willing)? I'm going back to school but I think about my family - the problems they're having, their needs, and that I may not have as much time with them as I'd hope. I'm finding most of my free time is gone due to school. I have almost no time to spend with anyone anymore. If this continues, I'll feel like I'm abandoning my family and friends for years while I go to school. Time I can never get back. I have an Uncle diagnosed with cancer and not given much longer to live...I don't even know if he knows Jesus. So little time to spend with anyone.

But God . . .

God encouraged me this morning.

He led me to Romans 5:3b-5

. . . that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

I always thought this meant that hard times I need to persevere through, this will produce character in me, and this will somehow bring me into hope. Once I reach this place of hope, I won't be disappointed because God will fill my heart with His love.

God gave me a new look at this.

I looked up some of the words in Strong's Concordance and using that, this is how I paraphrase those lines:

In hard times, wait patiently for God. In that patient waiting, God will bring me proof/experience (of His goodness I think), and that proof/experience (of God's goodness) brings me to have good expectations of the future. These good expectations of the future won't disappoint, shame, humiliate, or dishonor me, because the love of God (His love for me) has been poured out in my heart by the Holy Spirit who God gave me.

Now waiting patiently doesn't mean doing nothing. In David of the Bible, he waited to become King. While waiting he suffered being threatened with his life by King Saul. He didn't just sit there though. He befriended people, worked by protecting other people's sheep, and sang songs to God, trusting Him. In Joseph of the Bible, he waited to rule - but in the meantime, he worked as a slave for Potipher, becoming second only to Potipher in his household and staying true to God & trusting Him. Even when in prison, Joseph did his best while rising to the top in prison to be head over his fellow prisoners. Waiting patiently means doing the best you can where you are with what you have, trusting God and following Him as best you can.

Eventually in the patient waiting, I'll experience God's faithfulness and see God's goodness. Enough of these experiences will stir my heart to expect good from God whatever may come. I won't be disappointed because I'll be filled with God's love in my heart by His Spirit (I'll know He loves me).

posted by Colleen @ 8:00 PM